The Bridal Countdown – what to do in the final hours before saying I Do

It’s less than 24hrs to your big day and usually for brides, it’s both the best day and more stressful day of your life; stressful as it’s not something you to do very often, but also have put a lot of time, effort & money into making it your special day, so no pressure!

Even the most organised bride can end up stressed and forget something, namely a hairbrush; a simple but vital necessity for facing your guests the next day, minus Medusa hair! So, allow me to give you the benefit of my experience as a bride and also professional wedding celebrant.

If you are using a professional celebrant like myself or my colleagues, you’ll know already you are in safe hands, and every word & detail of the ceremony will be agreed and tailored with you & your loved one in mind. Therefore, no worries about someone going off script during the homily or being subjected to civil servant speak or a set theology. In addition, the legal side will generally be done already, taking the pressure off you and making the day more about the celebration than the legalities.

In my experience, there are three helpful dictums to keep in mind, namely ‘Be prepared’, ‘Get a good night’s sleep’ & ‘Don’t try anything new on the day’. That all sounds simple, doesn’t it? However in the flurry of guests arriving, hectic and exciting as that is, these can be difficult to achieve, but so worthwhile for your blood pressure & sanity sake!

Be prepared: how best to achieve this without turning into a micro-managing Bridezilla.

Firstly, concentrate on the necessities to actually get married – use a check list if you’re a pencil & paper gal. Examples – is the legal paperwork done or prepped? Has the person performing the ceremony confirmed they will be there at the time & date (at a friend’s wedding the bride arrived before the priest as he had the time wrong) and your two witnesses, the same? Well, they’re the absolute essentials to get married, everything else is nice but not as necessary. Therefore with those ticked off the list, release the tension & breathe deeply again!

Next consider your own needs for the day & your groom (and your children, if you have them), so rings, clothes, flowers & any additional personalising aspects to your wedding. Usually it’s the small personal touches that can get missed e.g, your sand for the Sand ceremony is currently a claggy mass at the bottom of a jam jar, or your Father needs a proper colour co-ordinated pocket hanky as he’s likely to cry walking you down the aisle, or you’re exchanging love letters & wine for the wine box part of the ceremony. I found it helpful to visualise each person getting ready and then the ceremony prep and details to make sure nothing is forgotten.

You may well ask, what about the rest of the wedding party? Will hopefully at this stage, everything else has been delegated to your maid of honour/bridesmaids and the groomsmen. If you haven’t done this, for your own sake do it by text tonight! Even if it is 10 pm at night! I know you may feel you don’t wish to bother family or friends, but the whole day is about you and your other half so why wouldn’t people want to help? Go for it, just ask! Your loved ones will be delighted to play their part! Having said this, on the other hand people like to make their problems yours; at a wedding I attended, the bride was stopped during the reception and asked to sort out her guest’s babysitting arrangements with the Hotel. I thought the bride was very restrained in directing the person to hotel reception, rather than over the nearest short pier! And in a more mundane example ; let’s say your Auntie Joan insists you book hair & make up for your cousin flying in from Geneva in the morning – please, it’s not your problem! She’s an adult, she can look after herself. Or little Johnny’s forgotten his dress shoes/tie/cufflinks/ to print out his reading ; delete as appropriate! Even if it’s easier for you to sort it, still ask yourself first who else can do and delegate, delegate, delegate because you don’t need the stress but you do need your mind clear to focus on really enjoying every minute of your special day! Just keeping repeating ‘it’s my special day’ and prioritise accordingly. And if in doubt, let your crack ninja bridesmaids to sort it out!

Get a good night’s sleep – you’ll need to be well rested to have the energy to smile all day and dance all night, so get a good sleep goes without saying, but may be easier to say than do.

If you’re the type of person who spends the night before anything importance, tossing & turning whiling fretting the night away; then doing the above to-do list, visualisation & last minute texting, troubleshooting/delegating should take away most reasons to fret. If you’ve covered your essentials then everything else is really out of your control, like the weather (blessed Padre Pio statue aside).

Well bride-to-be, at this point you may be tempted to congratulate yourself for getting this far without a major melt down and toss back a large glass of vino, however if you can at all possibly avoid this, please do. Studies show that even a unit of alcohol can fracture your sleep pattern, leaving you less rested. Never mind the potential for puffy eye lids etc. Also avoid blue screens i.e. TV, laptops & phones for an hour before you wish to go to bed, as the light disturbs your natural sleep inclination. If you are worried you won’t feel sleepy, try the traditional warm milky drink and or a turkey sandwich, both of which encourages sleepiness. If you haven’t sent your overnight bag on, you could use the time before bed to make sure you’ve packed your bag with everything you’ll need for the day after, not forgetting the basics! If you can bring a spare charger, brush etc and pack them the night before instead of trying to remember to bring them after use in the morning. Learn from me, you won’t be waking up your mother the next day begging for a hairbrush. If you do need to pack something the next day e.g. keys or hair straighter, pop it onto a post-it note on the door out as well as flagging it with someone to look after this and the packed bag.

Now you’re finally in bed & all prepared, my final sleep suggestion may sound odd, but use a silk pillowcase or cover your pillow tightly with something silk as this will help prevent sleep lines and fizzy/fly away hair. Caroline Hirons the well know beautician & beauty blogger swears by this!

Don’t do anything new: except get a new husband!

Try everything on well before the day, which means dress, underwear, shoes and any new make-up/skin care/ hair care should be tried and tested, so as not to cause any anguish on the day. Don’t get carried away by enthusiasm or panic and throw on a face mask/hair conditioner or lotion unless instructed by your hairstylist/make-up artist. It may be an urban myth but everyone’s heard of the bride who decided to condition her hair with an egg the morning of and then rinsed with hot water; cue scrambled egg hair & sobs! I was also told to cut my usual SPF/sun block as this can give a ghostly glow to your face in photographs! Your makeup artist should be able to advise on a replacement, again trial it before you need to use it.

And finally, as you leave your house/mother’s house/hotel room looking radiant and fabulously bridal, make sure someone has been delegated to switch things off. We returned home to find a hair curler still plugged in and on for nearly 48 hours! Such a lucky escape! So, one last check before leaving and the day will remain memorable for lovely positive romantic reasons.

Now….. get out that door and stun your groom with your fabulous bridal self!

Written by Nicola